Tuesday 3 October 2017

Attitude - it can be your saving grace


First post.

Like everyone who is reading this knows, yep, life can deliver a few hard knocks, get a bit frustrating or just get you tired of being tired. Maybe you haven't had a holiday for a while due to circumstances beyond your control. End of the year can sometimes have this affect too - you've put in 12 months and worked hard, exhausted. 
Similarly starts of the year can weigh in like pro-fighters with fists the size of your face as well. Add to that deaths, divorces, dramas, break-ups, teenager issues, smaller children acting like teenagers, work problems etc and all of sudden, it can feel like you're carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders whilst riding on a 4 x G-force roller coaster. 
Needless to say, sometimes these pressures can build up (see what I did there?) and both big and small annoyances can feel like mountains in no time flat.
But there is some good news - in just about all cases.
Consider this - if you were able to stop and look around, take a few calming breaths, plus deliberately alter how you are viewing things by challenging yourself, mountains CAN get smaller. Even if only by a millimetre or two. But a millimetre is a millimetre, right?

Its an improvement.
Often people who care about you, will act as catalysts by kicking you in the ass when needed, offering you support you didn't know you had,or maybe you'll just read something that will pick you up just enough to help. All o​f these things can allow you to see differences in your day that you couldn't see when you were upset/angry/frustrated. 
Its 100% true that anger and fear both cloud judgement.

But you can change all that. 
And like the title states, with attitude.
But how? 
Well, for everyone it's different, but in every case, the first step to be brave. Take that nervous or flustered feeling and turn it into something that works for you. A few stomach clenches with some even breathing will help too.

Once you've started that, here are a few things to get you started.
i) Lame as it sounds, you can tell yourself "I'm in control of how I'm going to handle this" - just dont do this in a mirror. That's weird. Especially if you get caught doing it.
ii) In any situation where you are feeling anxious/afraid/stressed out/annoyed - take a few calming breaths – oxygen is your friend. Just don't over do it. Breathe normally. Focus on it.
iii) Take a step back mentally (and physically if you need to) to get an objective/less stressful look at where you're at, even where others are at.
iv) Often the key to taking anxiety out of a situation is to ask questions to find out more. Knowing what you're dealing with is better than guessing. "Fear of the unknown" is a common problem - so fix it and ask so its not as unknown anymore.
v) Be brutally honest with yourself - try to analyse "why" you might feel the way you do about things - may not be the reason you thought. Did you fail to prepare? Do you still have time? Prepping is more important than you realise.
vi) Make a no-nonsense plan with how you're going to deal with the cause/s with how you will react - either physically or mentally – the actual cause make no difference. Again, you're deciding how you're going to handle this, how you are going to react.
vii) "Attack" your own negativity/fear/anxiety. These things will breed given half the chance. Remember - you're choosing how to react - I can't state this enough - it really is your choice.
viii) Act positively - do what you planned to do - you're taking your own power back from the situation/mood that took it away. No matter how bad the situation might appear to be, its on you to try and improve it for yourself.

...And surprisingly all these things can literally take seconds to work through.

The key is always around trying to have an objective look at what is happening around you. Increasing your awareness to your environment. Emotional content can be the one thing that hinders you trying to think logically. By finding a way to remove some of the emotional content, often the situation cane become clearer. 
Now I'm not saying you should be emotionless or Mr or Ms (Miss, Mrs etc) Positivity or over the top prepared either.
...but a little internal positivity and logic can go a long way.
And once you get into the habit, changing your attitude and the way you view a situation can get easier.

Clear heads see clear things.

To wrap this up, these are just the tips of the iceberg. Hopefully something in here has made a bit of sense and perhaps it has helped. Attitude is one of those things about you that can keep you safe, can be a powerful line of defence when you need one, and can change the way you view the world.

Through it you can help yourself.
As an aside from looking after yourself and gettin' your own head on straight, something else you can consider, is the picture below. 

Whilst you are getting yourself together, spare a thought for how your own attitude might be impacting on others. They connect and have the ability to grow with those around you. If yours is positive, often those around you will head in that direction too. It has to be real and genuine though.

Give it a shot, and good luck. 
So, post over. Thank you for coming by. Please feel free to offer any helpful suggestions you might have so that any others who might come by for a read get the value of your insights too.

#strongerthanyourealise #yougotthis

Darren



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